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College Sex & Love: First Love and Heartbreak

by Julia Sagaral


Why do times of personal crisis always seem to happen in the middle of mid-terms or essay deadlines?

During university I watched my friends go through the turbulence of romantic relationships. Disheartened by the emotional wreckage relationships can produce, I had a negative attitude towards relationships.

University was already a stressful experience and relationship problems only seemed to contribute to the stress. I often wondered if it was possibile to get through life without being heartbroken. But as fate would dictate, I would not be exempt from my share of heartache.

Opposites Attract

At the beginning of university, I became romantically involved with a guy named Ryan, which grew into an intense three year relationship.

I had known Ryan for quite a while, in fact, since the beginning of high school. From my first encounter with him, I found his eccentricity and charismatic flare to be attractive. Ryan was the type to defy conformity and social approval. I admired his courage perhaps because I lacked courage myself.

But Ryan was someone I never imagined dating. Our personalities were so different: we were completely opposite, even incompatible. He had this big personality that loved to challenge everything, even stir up trouble.

Although Ryan would irritate and make me angry, he had a charm to his rebelliousness. They say anger and passion are two closely related emotions. I was charmed by the way he flirtatiously irritated me.

What do you do when innocent infatuation turns into serious attraction?

There came a point when I realized that my innocent infatuation with Ryan was becoming serious. As I spent more time with him our friendship started developing. I began to see a different side of Ryan: I saw his passionate and sensitive side. I saw a man with a loving and tender heart that was troubled with anger, hurt and bitterness.

My heart broke to learn about the painful things he experienced in childhood. I wanted to love and accept him. I was excited to learn that we shared similar struggles in life. Now finding a mutual connection, we started talking regularly on the phone, email and MSN.

This is when things became complicated.

Continue to page 2 >> Disappointment with Ryan 1.2.3.4

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